The Next Step

SOOOOOOOO...


I am a strong believer in the idea that things happen for a reason. Some things I understand and some will never be apparent to me while I stand breathing on this earth. The one thing that keeps swinging around in my direction is that the last big purchase Tyson made was a camera for me. This just keeps coming back into my head. He encouraged me to take a class to learn more my camera so that I could improve my skills. I took some engagement pictures for a friend of Natalias and they were so pleased with them that they asked me to do their wedding in July 2010. I never had the chance to do that wedding, Tyson passed away 3 weeks before and I had to ask them to scramble to find someone else... I didn't know what life was going to be like the next day let alone the day of the wedding. I was meant to put photography to the side and focus on me. Focus on surviving a life without Tyson, and focus on me - healing, grieving, and growing. I don't know why Tyson was taken from me or what it means in the scheme of life but one day it will make sense. I was offered a position to tour with a show. This opportunity allowed me to do lots of things. Time to heal, the ability to see the country, a chance to save a little money. As tour is coming to an end I have been thinking about the next step. I had been praying hard in may as I approached my visit home for the layoff so that I would know what to tell people when I went home what was coming after tour. On May 17th (exactly 11 months) after Tyson passed away, I knew. I knew deep down in my heart that I needed to dive head first into photography, I need to learn as much as I can and then somehow turn it into a business. Research, practice, take classes, whatever I need to do to make this work I need to do it. I deserve to follow this dream and see if I can make it a reality. Its scary, and I sometimes don't know where to start. My biggest supporter was Tyson. He held my hand through all my insecurities and short comings and made me feel like I could do anything. Im getting all sweaty just thinking about doing it without him but If I close my eyes and imagine real hard I can see him sitting next me saying, "do it, you'll be just fine". There was a reason I got that camera from him. It would be the first of many steps I needed to take to heal and follow a dream.

When I came home during those two weeks I slowly started telling people about my plan. Guess what! Everyone was my cheerleader. Everyone told me that it was great idea and that I should try it out. I don't know how it's going to work or how Ill make money at first but I know that it will work out... eventually. I don't expect results right away but with time I hope to turn it into something. Im scared and nervous and VERY excited all at the same time. I also want to take some graphic design classes as well so that I can take the techniques Ms. Amy Freisen showed me and possibly start doing Christmas cards for family and friends as well. She did my Save-the-Dates for the wedding as well as my Christmas Card in 2009. Im not opposed to picking up a part time job to help me make ends meet but I know that If I come home and try to juggle a full time job and learn all this stuff it just wont happen. I need to jump in!!! Sink or swim. I can't wait to learn and improve. Here goes...


These are the few pictures I have done over the past year that I either have on my laptop or was able to steal from my Facebook account.